Enemies of the Show

Pauley Perrette

[1] Pauley Perrette AKA "World's Oldest Goth" Perrette became an official enemy of the show after antagonizing Julie and marring an otherwise delightful dog awards show in the process. Julie was working the event as a red carpet correspondent and asked Perrette whether or not she was intoxicated and if she planned to steal a dog from the event by smuggling it in her dress. Perrette took umbrage at the questions and attempted to eject Julie from the event. Every few weeks, Julie offers new ruminations on this bizarre encounter and mocks Perrette from afar, inspired largely by interviews the actress has given and her tweets.

Gnats

[2] Gnats AKA "Guh-Nats"

Patti Stanger

[3] "Patti Stang-air" A garbage person made out of snakes. She's a matchmaker with an irrational aversion to red hair and curly hair. Julie has deemed this yenta "bad for the Jews."

Mario Lopez

Frequent public binger and anti-circumcision zealot.

Jenny McCarthy

Murderer of children.

Anthony Bourdain

[4] Pretentious, faux-edgy television chef, and total asshole. His "No Reservations" theme song is potentially sung by a horse.

Neil LaBute

[5] Fat man. Hates women. Occasionally writes internet comments on reviews of his own plays.